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Old 01-08-2013, 01:06 AM   #1
Talon87
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Alabama destroys Notre Dame 42-14

I spent my second(? third?) year at my friend's house watching the BCS championship game. This year it was a match-up between Alabama and Notre Dame. Alabama was the house favorite, but Notre Dame's been the one that ESPN et al have been harping about all season long. Te'o this, Te'o that, Te'o, Te'o, Te'o. A lot of Notre Dame fans were quite upset when Te'o didn't get the Heisman this year, passed over for "Johnny Football" of A&M instead. Well, from what I saw tonight, it's a good thing they didn't waste the Heisman on this guy. ^^;; 'Cause he didn't do shit, and for a while there it was looking like it might even be a total shut out.

I predicted 42-7 Alabama. My friend predicted 35-14 Alabama. Another friend of ours predicted 52-0 Alabama. (And it was looking like he was going to be right, too, for most of the evening!) Nobody predicted a Notre Dame win, not a single soul. And ... that's pretty much what happened. It was brutal. One guest left once Alabama obtained their fifth touchdown, a bit bored with the game and wanting to go to sleep. The other guests (self included) pretty much quit watching the game entirely and focused squarely on idle chitchat for the final ten minutes or so, only occasionally glancing up at the screen to make sure nothing was missed.

This is probably the most you will ever hear Talon87 post about American football. (This comic is as apt as ever.)
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Old 01-08-2013, 01:53 AM   #2
deoxys
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"So this is where the NFL replacement refs went" - someone on facebook

Notre Dame is the favorite to win around these parts, too. For me, I can't stand college football. I just don't give a shit about it quite like the NFL.

In other news, watching the Bengals game the other night was the most disheartened I've felt in a long time. I beginning to feel like the Bengals won't ever win a Super Bowl title much less a playoff game...
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Old 01-08-2013, 02:11 AM   #3
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I don't care about handegg (especially college handegg) but this explains all those sounds I've been hearing outside for the past couple hours.
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Old 01-08-2013, 02:17 AM   #4
Talon87
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deoxys View Post
"So this is where the NFL replacement refs went" - someone on facebook

Notre Dame is the favorite to win around these parts, too. For me, I can't stand college football. I just don't give a shit about it quite like the NFL.

In other news, watching the Bengals game the other night was the most disheartened I've felt in a long time. I beginning to feel like the Bengals won't ever win a Super Bowl title much less a playoff game...
I was surprised to see someone say that when I came home too. Blamed the outcome on the refs, said this was all a big cheat, etc etc. Um, no. ^^; This was a bloodbath, pure and simple. Let me count the ways ...

1. Notre Dame losing possession of the ball constantly. How many times did they fumble? How many times was a pass of theirs incomplete? How many times did Alabama intercept the ball from Notre Dame? These things all happened more times than I can possibly count. Notre Dame had some of the worst control of a football I have ever seen.

2. Notre Dame's defense? What defense? This was embarrassing. Manti Te'o has been touted as one of the best college linemen of all time, but this guy held back the Crimson Tide about as well as a three-fingered mafioso can hold water in his cupped hand. I'm not trying to be a wordsmith here: dead seriously, Manti Te'o did not have ONE SINGLE SACK THE ENTIRE FIRST HALF OF THE GAME. And I'm not even sure if he had a single sack in the second half of the game either, to be perfectly honest! But good God. Good God! The camera captured so many embarrassing times where Te'o would dive for Alabama's quarterback ... and the quarterback would just daintily sidestep him and Te'o would go crashing into the turf, empty-handed. So many times. So many fucking times. At least five different plays this happened in. This embarrassing, peewee football level of play shit happened.

3. Boys vs. Men. Good gravy, it was painful watching Alabama vs. Notre Dame in large part because you could just tell the two teams were utterly mismatched. Notre Dame should not be in the same conference as Alabama. They are not on the same level as the college football schools in the South. Maybe they would have been king of the heap had they been in the mediocre Big Ten conference that Purdue and IU are in, and maybe they hungered for more of a challenge then that, but Christ, guys, you are not Alabama's equals! Not even close! This game was like watching a bunch of college kids (Alabama) take on a bunch of high school kids (Notre Dame). There was this one pass Notre Dame's QB threw to their wide receiver ... and the Alabama guy tailing him leapt off the ground faster and a good 2 to 3 feet higher into the air than the Notre Dame wide receiver could. Alabama didn't manage to intercept the ball -- lucky for Notre Dame! -- but it was a stuff all the same, as Notre Dame's pass was (of course) ruled incomplete. There was this other time that one of Alabama's offensive dudes, a guy by the name of Lacy, muscled through FOUR defensive linemen all with the power of his torso and his two legs. No arms. Because his arms were clutching the ball. He just marched through them. They were dragging him, desperately, and they managed to slow him down to like 2 miles per hour, making it possible for three to six additional Notre Dame players to mosh the guy. The opposite held true when it was Notre Dame's offense vs. Alabama's defense. Their receivers would catch the ball ... and then be PLANTED INTO THE GROUND by not one but two of Alabama's defensive players. Literally zero additional yards, zero additional inches gained beyond the yardage gained from the pass itself. Just completely dead on arrival. Caught the ball ... and then kissing turf. Or ND's quarterback would try to run with the ball ... and he'd not only be stopped, he'd be pushed BACK PAST WHERE HE STARTED by a good 5 yards. I don't even like American football and thus I don't watch it that much, but even I know that this was dis-fucking-graceful. Not of Alabama, but of the mismatch of sports ability in general. Like I said, it was like watching grown men trample little boys.

So no. This was not a case of refs making bad calls in favor of Alabama or against Notre Dame. Whether such calls were made or not, this game was by no means decided by them. And you don't have to take my word for it! Take the word of Notre Dame's coach during halftime!

Quote:
ESPN's sideline reporter, Heather Cox, had a gem of a question for Kelly as he came off the field: "Where do the fixes need to come in the second half?"

Kelly's response? Well, maybe if Alabama forgets about coming back out of the locker room:

"Uh, maybe Alabama doesn't come back in the second half," Kelly said. "It's all Alabama. We can't tackle them right now and who knows why. You know, they're big and physical. I guess I do know why. It's just that our guys have not tackled the way they have all year.

"And then we've got to get off press and man coverage, we haven't been able to do that. Credit Alabama. They played a great first half. We gotta go in there and get after it and play with some pride in the second half and try to get this thing closer so we can try to find a way to win."
Everyone in the room at my friend's party was really embarrassed for Coach Kelly when he said these words. It may not come across in the printed text alone, so if you can find a video+audio sample, by all means, do watch it. The guy was practically gushing idolatry for Alabama's performance in the first half. But yeah. When the reporter asks you "Where do the fixes need to come in the second half?" and you, the head coach, answer "Maybe if Alabama doesn't come back in the second half", that says it all. (I should probably add that at the time he said those words, the score was Notre Dame 0, Alabama 28.)

Last edited by Talon87; 01-08-2013 at 02:32 AM.
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Old 01-08-2013, 07:31 AM   #5
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To Manti Teo's credit, Talon, he wasn't really touted as much of a pass rusher going into the game. To that point, he only had 1.5 sacks in the previous 12 games. However, the reason why he was in consideration for the Heisman was that he was one of the top pass coverage linebackers with 7 interceptions, along with being the leader and leading tackler (IIRC) on one of the best statistical defenses in the country. Note the use of statistical, because their schedule was pretty weak. They played no one even near the caliber of Alabama all year, even going into Triple Overtime against an average at best Pittsburgh team. I'm glad that they gave the Heisman to Johnny Manziel too. He obviously deserved it for winning against this Alabama squad.

Final note: I was in a pool and predicted the final score to be 45-10 Alabama. I came in second though because a buddy of mine got the game score exactly right, at 42-14.

EDIT: Oh yeah, final interesting stat: Notre Dame had only allowed two 100 yard rushers all year, in twelve games. They allowed Alabama to have two 100 yard rushers last night, in Eddie Lacy and T.J. Yeldon.
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Old 01-08-2013, 11:57 AM   #6
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Yeah, that just further proves that Notre Dame's opponents during the regular season were nowhere near the caliber of Alabama, Auburn, Texas A&M, etc.
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Old 01-08-2013, 11:46 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deoxys View Post
In other news, watching the Bengals game the other night was the most disheartened I've felt in a long time. I beginning to feel like the Bengals won't ever win a Super Bowl title much less a playoff game...
Their defense will continue to be solid as long as Zimmer is employed there, but they need an o-line to protect my favorite quarterback in the world, Andy Dalton. Dalton actually played fairly well in the playoff loss, despite the statistical ineptitude of the Bengal offense- he was just hit and harried all the time. Picking up a bit of help on the interior OL and perhaps a young running back in the draft (perhaps Oklahoma State RB Joseph Randle or Michigan State yard-after-contact beast LeVeon Bell) would greatly improve the offensive performance.

Still, for the Bengals to make the playoffs in back to back years is an admirable accomplishment though I know the results have been frustrating so far. They'll win a playoff game or two in the coming years- just remind yourself of how young Dalton and Green both are.
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Old 01-09-2013, 12:01 AM   #8
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And be happy that your football team actually somewhat consistently gets to the playoffs. Not that I care much about NFL, but a quick glance at Wikipedia tells me that in every place I've lived (in the States), the representative NFL team has never had a winning regular season record during the time I lived there. Best records:

Detroit Lions: 8-8 (1999)
St. Louis Rams: 7-9 (2010)
Kansas City Chiefs: 7-9 (2011)
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