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Old 08-24-2013, 06:58 AM   #1776
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My knowledge of British PM's is Tony Blair, Margaret Thatcher, Winston Churchill, and the current guy is... David Cameron? So don't feel bad about not knowing presidents, haha.
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Old 08-24-2013, 07:05 AM   #1777
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>Obama

Although he's known as the 44th, there has actually been 42 different presidents of the US, as explained in this video.
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Old 08-24-2013, 08:28 AM   #1778
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My knowledge of British PM's is Tony Blair, Margaret Thatcher, Winston Churchill, and the current guy is... David Cameron? So don't feel bad about not knowing presidents, haha.
Yeah but American schooling is internationally notorious for being stupidly America-centric. I'm surprised you can name that many (although I'd bet that one of the main things you've been told about Churchill is that his mother was American).
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Old 08-24-2013, 10:02 AM   #1779
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Never heard that about Churchill.

Can add to phoopes's list John Major, Benjamin Disraeli, and Neville Chamberlain, but yeah, not that familiar with British PMs. (And w/o looking it up, wasn't Oliver Cromwell PM? Or was he just a different sort of statesman?)
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Old 08-24-2013, 10:11 AM   #1780
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I am amused that neither of you got Gordon Brown, and disappointed but not surprised that neither of you got Clement Atlee (took over in 1945, his government created the welfare state including amongst other things the NHS, generally up there with Thatcher and Churchill as the top three in most attempts at ranking PM's). Given he ran the government that created one of the most successful welfare states/system of socialised healtcare in the world I'd be surprised if he gets any mention in a country so apparently hellbent against those kind of things :p

Cromwells official title was "Lord Protector" - he was pretty much monarch in all but name, and his son succeeded him.
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Old 08-24-2013, 11:35 AM   #1781
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One short trip from British PM's, we have this gender swap.
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Old 08-24-2013, 11:41 AM   #1782
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One short trip from British PM's, we have this gender swap.
R BALLOONS SEXY

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Old 08-24-2013, 01:03 PM   #1783
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Washington through Quincy Adams + Lincoln + FDR + Maaaaaybe LBJ + Teddy + Wilson + the most recent 5, with the possible exclusion of George H. W. Bush.
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As for US presidents, Obama is the 44th so let's see how many I can name;

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FDR, Teddy Roosevelt (death had to take him sleeping for if he'd been awake there'd have been a fight), Washington, Lincoln, Lyndon Johnson, Kennedy, Obama, Bush Sr, Bush Jr, Clinton, Reagan, Nixon, Wilson. 14's all I can do. I seem to recall various founding fathers took turns at being President but god knows which ones.

Later history classes covered international stuff from WW1 through to about the Cuban Missile Crisis, plus Lincoln/Washington being obvious, plus the modern ones.
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I'm surprised you got Nixon. I guess Watergate is pretty well known outside the US. Surprisingly, Nixon was a pretty cool president, he just cared a whole bunch more than he needed to and was a dick about fixing problems.

I guess I overestimated your ability to name the first few, though. Adams, Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, and Quincy Adams are ridiculously easy to remember. Madison was a weakling who was in office during the War of 1812 and the Father of the Constitution, then you have GWash and the Adams family. Monroe might be tricky, I dunno, but he's similar enough to Madison that I can always remember him.

Andrew Jackson's trickier, but he was the Rise of the Common Man. After that you have sod-all because those presidents really aren't that important. Van Buren, Harrison, etc.

It's hilarious how close I got to your guesses, though.
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Old 08-24-2013, 01:34 PM   #1784
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>Shuckle

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Looking down wikipedia's list, there's about 8-10 more I reckon I should've got (Buchanan, McKinley, Cleeveland, Taft, Hoover, Truman, Eisenhower, Ford, Carter). The various founding fathers who ran the joint after Washington mean nothing to me except for Jefferson. Ditto the war of 1812 doesn't mean that much to me (you vs Canada?). For our history lessons, the revolution period time frame is more about the pretty much global war Britain was fighting with the French, Spanish and Dutch Empires at the time (of which the Revolution was a part), and the later period goes into the French Revolutionary Wars and the Napoleonic Wars.
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Old 08-24-2013, 02:36 PM   #1785
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>Concept
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Taft will be universally remembered as the President who was so fat, he got stuck in the White House bathtub.

The War of 1812 was about British impressment of American sailors, and also you called us a little baby country and we didn't like it. Also, we wanted to steal Indian land and you were like "nah bruh that ain't right." It was indeed between GB and US, but happened at the same time as the Napoleonic Wars so it's understandable that you'd fail to find a reason to care. :P


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Old 08-25-2013, 01:28 AM   #1786
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So when I was about to check my mail, I came across one of those typical shock murder stories. I usually don't pay attention to them, because I would just be feeding the ratings for those kinds of stories, but something about this one caught my attention. It was this picture of a "mourning" family member. When I saw that picture, I laughed. Oh my fucking god I laughed. I think she's supposed to be crying over her dead family, but to me she looks like she's disappointed after dropping her cake. More of these shock murder stories should have pictures like that.

Actually, I have a great idea for funerals. If I were a dead body man, I would put a huge grin on the dead bodies for the funerals (open eyes of course). I think it would liven up the occasion. Kids would be all "It's so sad that grandma died.", and the parent would go "Don't be sad. Look at how happy she is!"
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Old 08-25-2013, 07:34 AM   #1787
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dead body man
Funeral director? Mortician? Undertaker?
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Old 08-25-2013, 10:47 AM   #1788
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Sea otter doing what sea otters do best.
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Old 08-25-2013, 11:39 AM   #1789
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Funeral director? Mortician? Undertaker?
Dead body man is 1000x cooler.
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Old 08-25-2013, 12:55 PM   #1790
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Dead body man is 1000x cooler.
Fun French fact: Undertakers, in the old days (say when european folks started living in America), they were nicknamed "croque-morts" (literally means "dead-biters"), because legend say biting a body's ear or toe was how they verify if a person was really dead. The real reason though is since their job is to bury the bodies and such, it gave the impression they would make the bodies dissapear, as if they ate them (as in biting = chewing, eating).
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Old 08-25-2013, 01:29 PM   #1791
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Late to the party, but add William Gladstone to the list of British PMs that an American (me) has heard of.
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Old 08-25-2013, 01:52 PM   #1792
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Broke up with my girlfriend about a month ago. We both still liked each other, but she was going to be away for awhile and then was leaving for college, so it was kind of a mutual thing, and she didn't want a relationship with a guy back home while she was there. I had still been thinking about her for a while, and I went to a party tonight. I decided it was really time to kind of put myself out there so I could move on, and I did. There was a girl there who I'd known for awhile, but never really all that well. We really hit it off, danced the whole time, flirted a bit. So then after the party's over, I ask her for her number, turns out she's "kind of with someone" from a different school. But she still wants to hang out sometime as friends. I'd definitely be cool with this idea normally, but the whole thing where she was flirting with me the whole night even though she was with someone doesn't really sit well with me if she wanted to come over to my house or something, since admittedly after tonight I do have a bit of a crush on her or something. I dunno, overall I'm just pretty confused about how I feel about her, and my ex still.
im sorry things ended between you and your girlfriend phoopy
Really wanted to reply with a "phooped his pants" joke. Would that have been wrong? [/george costanza]
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Old 08-25-2013, 01:57 PM   #1793
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brb crying

Nah, I got a good chuckle out of that. I like puns, and it's good to laugh at yourself every once and awhile.
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Old 08-25-2013, 03:35 PM   #1794
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My phoopes-related goal in life is to find a relevant situation for a significant number of phoopes puns I have set aside.
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Old 08-25-2013, 03:37 PM   #1795
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Guys, guys. Seriously? Puns? Stop being Nincomphoopes.
*ba dum tiss*
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Old 08-26-2013, 07:38 AM   #1796
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Horrible Histories was glorious. Had the entire set up until I left secondary school, then I donated them all the the school library because I felt I'd outgrown them. Made me sad, but it was the right choice.
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Old 08-27-2013, 02:15 PM   #1797
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Japanese Beyoncé - Watanabe Naomi, the video advertises.

But it's kind of hard to claim that you're a Japanese Beyoncé when every video I find of your performances on YouTube has you clearly lip synching her songs. ^^; Here's Number 2, for example. Clearly just lip synching, not even trying to hide it. And here's Number 3. (What's really embarrassing about this one is that the host asks the audience to give her a big round of applause, but then -- utter silence. ^^; The sound seems to sort of go unnaturally quiet there, though, so I'm thinking that the video is just missing the sound there. But if not ... daaaaayum, what a cold reception. ^^;; ) So where are the bonafide impressions you do? Or do you only do lip synching?

And when it's not videos of your performances, apparently it's videos of interviewers finding your stash of eromanga magazines and you then doing impressions of family restaurant employees with vibrating dildos stuck up their ******s. ^^;
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Old 08-27-2013, 02:46 PM   #1798
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A great rule of thumb here; if you have to describe yourself as "the [nationality] [person]" or "[time period] [group]" - Japanese Beyonce, 2010's answer to the Beatles, whatever - you're almost certainly massively inferior to them. If you weren't, wannabes would be describing themselves as the [x] version of you.

I don't even like Beyonce much, but this girl .
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Old 08-28-2013, 01:12 AM   #1799
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She is much thinner and less comically over-sized in the porno raid video. That said, I think most of the appeal is she's the embodiment of physical comedy. From Talon's description I had an inkling she was lip-synching her own songs...but then I listened to the video.
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Old 08-28-2013, 10:18 AM   #1800
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She is much thinner and less comically over-sized in the porno raid video. That said, I think most of the appeal is she's the embodiment of physical comedy.
The porno raid video was the oldest one. I suspect that when she rose to fame she was just a chubby girl, but then her talent agent(s) advised her to embrace her weight and to put more on. So she went from being a chubby girl to being a fat woman. Likewise, her agent(s) may have seized upon the public discovering that she liked porn; this, in combination with Beyoncé's own sex appeal and sexually suggestive stage performances (as is sadly par for the course these days for any female pop star in America), may have led to Naomi's own act heavily emphasizing all of those hip thrusts. Basically, "the public loves you because you're a fat chick who thinks she can be sexy. What a hoot! Keep 'em laughing, girl!"

This was precisely the context I found her in. I was watching one of the "No Laughing" New Year specials of Gaki no Tsukai's and at one point the men are placed before a stage and told that American celebrities will be showing up. First is Naomi -- a fat Japanese Beyoncé impersonator -- and second was some other quite overweight woman who was dressed like Madonna and was probably meant to be an oversized Madonna impersonator. Several times, the men comment on how much weight Naomi has put on; and each time she does one of her pelvic thrust marathons, they lose control and start laughing. It's hard to tell how much of it is them laughing at the outrageousness of her on-stage humor -- the "physical comedy", as you put it -- and how much of it is them laughing at a fat chick trying to be sexy. But it's hard to think that there isn't at least some of the latter given how they mentioned her weight gain. Might they have burst out laughing had Beyoncé Knowles started thrusting her hips like a jackhammer? Maybe. But I dunno. I get the feeling that her weight gain was a calculated decision by her and/or her agent(s) to try and play up her comic appeal.

Anyway, I'm just disappointed that they call her a Japanese Beyoncé when all she is is some ordinary person who is lip synching to Beyoncé's songs. As a comedy act, I don't really find it funny; and as a musical act, well, it isn't one, is it?
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