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Old 11-29-2018, 09:07 PM   #1
Blastoise
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PSA: Don't Buy Cat Helmet Special Editions (Also: Let's Shit on Fallout 76)

Uh oh, Spaghetti-O's:

Quote:
Bethesda are giving a couple bucks in microtransaction currency to Fallout 76 players who bought the Ł175 ‘Power Armor Edition’ expecting its numerous feelies to include a “canvas West Tek duffel bag”, only to find it had been replaced with a trashy nylon bag. Video game Collector’s Editions capitalise on fan enthusiasm to sell overpriced trinkets and tat, but even the credulous should get the tat they paid for.
But it's okay guys, the PR mavens at Bethesda got this shit on lock:

Quote:
So Bethesda are offering the dissatisfied 500 ‘Atoms’ to spend on cosmetic doodads in the microtransaction store, a quantity which would otherwise cost players Ł4/€5/$5.
Quote:
“The bag shown in the media was a prototype and was too expensive to make,” a support person told the complainer. Bethesda were quick to refute this.

“The Bethesda Store’s Support member is a temporary contract employee and not directly employed by Bethesda or Bethesda Game Studios,” they said. “We apologize to the customer who took the time to reach out. The support response was incorrect and not in accordance with our conduct policy.”
I'm sure people who dropped $200 on the special edition for a game that doesn't fucking work and for swag that isn't what was advertised will be stoked with "it's the intern's fault, here's some Monopoly money" (that, as one wag pointed out, isn't even enough to buy a canvas messenger bag in the actual video game). Good thing they didn't go out of their way to hype up the collector's edition at their E3 conference or anything silly like that!

So I know that getting out the steel-toed boots for Fallout 76 is already overplayed, with numerous Youtubers breathlessly cutting 30 minute videos dissecting the user scores on Metacritic (the most worthless metric in God's creation). And in a sense this is kind of like Eververse was for Destiny 2 on release: something that people would have grudgingly accepted if the game had met their expectations, but became a rallying cry for critics of the game even though it was mostly tangential to the game's main failings.

But seriously folks, in TYOOL 2018 there are no shortage of licensed toymakers and sketchy fly-by-night miniatures companies that will let you drop big money on a Dante figure with accurately-modeled genitalia or "It's Not Actually T-51b Armor Because We Don't Call It That" pewter figures. Don't drop hundreds of bucks on shitty collector's editions with lowest-bidder swag that cost 15 cents in a Chinese sweatshop.

Also, don't advertise your cat helmets at E3. Or make a Fallout game that makes people look at Brotherhood of Steel fondly by comparison.
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Last edited by Blastoise; 11-29-2018 at 09:36 PM. Reason: i spel gud
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Old 11-29-2018, 09:42 PM   #2
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Stuff like this makes me realize that Crotch Zombie really nailed where the internet was going toward the end of ForumWarz.

Back in 2011, they designed a parody of the the microtransaction economy before it came into existence that was iCapitalism: make an in-app purchase, get your name to the top of a leaderboard. How do you win? Throw more money into the app than your friends and rivals. Where's the fun? The fun is in your vain struggle for supremacy over your inferiors. It's the only game that would get Patrick Bateman and his clique to flash credit cards instead of business cards.

I was going to ask, "What's the deal with Bethesda" but I don't think any more needs to be said, Blastoise. If it did, someone would probably have to pay for it.
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Old 12-01-2018, 07:34 AM   #3
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It gets worse, which is to say better.

Turns out so-called 'influencers' got a fancy backpack for helping promote FO76, and that's only adding fuel to the already raging inferno.
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Old 12-11-2018, 09:49 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by Raves View Post
It gets worse, which is to say better.

Turns out so-called 'influencers' got a fancy backpack for helping promote FO76, and that's only adding fuel to the already raging inferno.
It's cool though, Bethesda eventually realized this wasn't a customer service hill to die on and offered to replace the bags with what they actually showed off in their E3 presentation.

...only to fuck that up and make it so that customers who sent in requests for a replacement bag got access to their ticketing system, to the point where they could view the personal information of and close tickets belonging to other customers.

Spoiler: show
THE ARISTOCRATS
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Old 12-11-2018, 10:00 PM   #5
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What a world we live in now, where cheap Chinese-made knicknacks are now elite status symbols among gamers.
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Old 01-04-2019, 09:25 AM   #6
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Fallout 76 Starts Off 2019 With Glitched Nukes

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Players discovered this yesterday on January 1, the day of the game’s weekly reset. Instead of silos re-opening after use, players found that the silos were locked with a new countdown timer of 9,999 hours. The scorched officer enemies who normally drop parts of the nuke codes necessary to launch the game’s nuclear weapons weren’t spawning either. Even the intel monitor in the enclave bunker was glitched, showing the words “complete” and “incomplete” superimposed over one another and hashtags in the place where letters should be.

Fighting through heavily fortified silos to rain nukes down on different parts of the map is Fallout 76’s main end-game activity, and almost two months after release, it’s one of the only things keeping most diehard fans around, since enemies found in the nuked areas are higher level and drop legendary gear. The silos going down is basically equivalent to a raid in Destiny temporarily going offline.
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Old 01-04-2019, 04:09 PM   #7
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lmfao
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