UPNetwork  

Go Back   UPNetwork > General Forums > Video Games

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 12-03-2007, 04:51 PM   #1
Talon87
時の彼方へ
 
Talon87's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Lafayette, Indiana
Posts: 20,578
I want a Vii!

First, watch as much of this as you want. (Don't stop before getting to see "James", but you can stop once you see "James" endorsing the Vii around 50 seconds in) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9rcqjB2tYc

Then, after you've learned what the Vii is, check out what makes the magic happen with this priceless video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncRWCVdFFM8 . If you get bored, I suggest skipping ahead to 40 seconds -- go too far, and you'll ruin the surprise!

The Vii can be yours now for just 1000 yuan. Order yours today!
Talon87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-03-2007, 08:14 PM   #2
Jerichi
プラスチック♡ラブ
 
Jerichi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: 蒸気の波の中
Posts: 14,766
Re: I want a Vii!

X.

F.

D.

My God; I knew China was cheap, but, wow, I never knew they could stoop this low. First, they steal the idea for a Japanese product, then the emulate it extremely poorly and cheaply to make a couple thousand yuan. How depressing, yet completely and utterly hilarious.
__________________


私のことを消して本気で愛さないで 恋なんてただのゲーム 楽しめばそれでいい
閉ざした心を飾る 派手なドレスも靴も 孤独の友達

asbwffb

[jerichi]
Jerichi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-03-2007, 08:36 PM   #3
ajnrules
Boulder Badge
 
ajnrules's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 117
Re: I want a Vii!

Well, I understood everything, so I watched the entire thing.

Translations of the first video
Narrator: The Vii system officially goes gold today! This is no illusion. This really is the simulated video game system that's making waves around the world, the Vii. Just point the controller at the TV, and you'd be able to play tennis, go fishing, go shooting, and play up to twelve different international sports. There is no limitation based on weather conditions, space, or air. The Vii's authentic sport controls has made a fan out of James, the co-chair of the Singapore Olympic Committee.
James: Promoting exercise among children is the best present a parent can give.
Narrator: The Vii gives kids an oppoortunity to build up their exercise spirit in the comfort of their own homes, preventing you from having to waste money to get your kids to exercise. You can also save time and storage space. There are as many as twelve international sports inside this tiny Vii system. Realistic pictures, lag-free motion detection, real-time sound effects, and realistic vibrations can create an authentic sporting experience.
Kid A: It's great!
Kid B: It's really, very fun!
Kid C: I like fishing! It's just like the real thing!
Kid D: It's tiring. It's no different from real exercise.
Narrator: Just point the controller at the TV, and you'd be able to play tennis, go fishing, go shooting, and play up to twelve different international sports. The completely Chinese interface makes it usable for both children and seniors. The 45-minute warning system can protect children's eyesight and prevent fatigue. You can pick from three different colors. And the system comes with 12 different games and decals for your controllers.
I can make out "Not too high. Not too high," "Woohoo," and "Yes! Yes! Yes!"
James: He's just like me, and can guarantee the success [of the Vii]
Narrator: How long has it been since you spent time with your kids? Do you know how lonely your parents are? The Vii can give you an opportunity to show your love for your entire family. You can build a bridge between your spouse, and can give your lonely parents the ability to be happy again. Your entire family will be happy. Just point the controller at the TV, and you'd be able to play tennis, go fishing, go shooting, and play up to twelve different international sports. The completely Chinese interface makes it usable for both children and seniors. The 45-minute warning system can protect children's eyesight and prevent fatigue. The ergonomic design of the controller will endear it to the entire family. Just point the controller at the TV, and you'd be able to play tennis, go fishing, go shooting, and play up to twelve different international sports. Your children and senior citizens will surely find a sport that they love. The entire family of James, the co-chair of the Singapore Olympic Committe, are lovers of the Vii. Realistic pictures, real-time sound effects, realistic vibrations, and lag-free motion detection can create an authentic sporting experience. The Vii will bring happiness to the entire family. The launch of the Vii has bought positive response on [the website posted on the screen]. Want to learn more about the Vii? Just hope online.

Translations of the second video
Person A: Dear readers. What you are seeing now is what we are seeing. This is the final screw. We will be able to see what the inside of the Vii looks like.
Person B: I bet it's terrifying.
Person A: We have all sorts of theories. My guess is that it's filled with air. And what about you, Xien-Er?
Person B: Hmm, that's pretty precise.
Person C: Is it really?
Person A: Hahaha.
Person C: I think it's probably cotton.
Person A: Actually...actually cotton is probably heavier than this. Doesn't matter. We are about to find out. Let's go.
Person B: Oh...
Person A: I've got a bad feeling that I wouldn't be able to put this back together.
Person B: Oh well. It's only a Vii anyways.
Person A: It's coming! It's coming! We are about to see what is inside a Vii!
All: Ahaha! Wah! Hahahahahaha!
Person A: What a surprise! This is just too shocking, Jack. Wow!
Person C: Why don't they just make it smaller?
Person A: That means we can make one that's only this small.
Person B: They probably just want to make it look like the Wii, use that as a selling point.
Person A: Otherwise...
Person C: But why?
Person B: That's powerful.
Person C: Hahaha.
Person A: So, are there any professionals that can help us explain this? Ok.
Person B: We should let Jouston explain it.
Person A: At least we proved a few things. First, these ports is real, these two, the two over here, really are connected to the main system. We don't know what they do, but we know that they are not fake. Second, the makers are afraid that this isn't heavy enough, so they glued a metal bar to the bottom.
Person B: Hahaha
Person A: To increase the weight.
Person C: That's whack.
Person B: That's powerful.
Person A: And then...let me see, this is the power source. The power source is basically something that looks like a power source. They deliberately left four connections, but only two are coming out. Apparently two of them are useless. And then there's this signal detector. There are three wires coming out, but in the end only (pause) two remains. Is this right?
Person B: Actually, I don't have much of an idea.
Person C: I don't know either. I don't know.
Person A: Are there any readers that can explain this to us? This is it. There's nothing out. That's whack.
Person B: That's too whacked up.
Person A: Too whacked up. Ok. I don't have anything else to say about this. You know what's the next thing we can do? We can create a shell that's only this small. And then we can play it.
Person B: We can just give it to Jouston.
Person A: Yeah, just give it to Jouston.
Person C: Good idea.

Anyways, that's it. Now for my thoughts on the matter. Yeah, it's a pretty cheap knock-off, but then again, China is like the home of pirates. And it's also true that there is an official distributor of Nintendo products in mainland China (the iQue), but that's pretty whack because they've been releasing only like 2-3 games a year for the past 3 years. And their main focus is on handhelds. So the only options of getting the gameplay that the Wii brings about is to import a Wii, which probably isn't very easy...or a budding entrepreneuer and his game-making buddies can make the Vii. Frankly, I'm kind of impressed that they've managed to design a system like this.

I have an iQue Player. It's awesome. :o
__________________
ajnrules is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-03-2007, 09:38 PM   #4
Talon87
時の彼方へ
 
Talon87's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Lafayette, Indiana
Posts: 20,578
Re: I want a Vii!

Thanks for the translation, irlanalri2! Not just for us here at UPN, but also for my friend who was the one to show me this -- now I can let him enjoy the translation of each video for himself. Very nice gesture I get to make, and it's all thanks to you. (I will give you credit, of course! )

Regarding "China, land of the pirates," lol, for hundreds of years it was the other way around, with Japanese pirates terrorizing Chinese and Korean merchant ships. And now? Looks like the tables have turned.

Regarding "China, land of the limited access to Nintendo goods," yeah, apparently quite a few Chinese Americans on Youtube had the same thoughts. They pointed out (for those of us who didn't grow up Chinese American) that Nintendo is sort of mean towards China and (intentionally?) forks China over compared with the rest of the world, not releasing their games or their consoles in mainland China until years after the releases in other regions. So the Chinese are left to say, "Well, if you won't play nice, Japan, then we don't have to play nice, either," and they import a Wii, dissect it, figure out how to clone the hardware, write their own OS for it, and voilÃÂ*: authentic Chinese console inspired 95% by Japanese design. (To the people who say, "Hey, no fair! ", how the fuck do you think Pakistan and India developed their nukes, huh? Do you honestly think that the eight nuclear powers of the world each came up with (a) their own unique design or (b) the same design but independently of the others with no peeking at blueprints and schematics? Please. It's the same thing here, only it's video games -- SERIOUS BUSINESS -- and not nukes. ;) :P )

Regarding the iQue ... hey, do you remember the WonderSwan? And I think I've heard that the iQue is actually better than our (American) N64. No?
Talon87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2007, 02:22 AM   #5
ajnrules
Boulder Badge
 
ajnrules's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 117
Re: I want a Vii!

Well, the graphics are more spruced up, it's much more portable, and there are three N64 games that were not available in the US for the iQue. I guess the first thing is sort of a given considering the iQue Player didn't launch until 7 years after the N64. And hey, the iQue Player could be a good tool for people that want to learn Chinese. And I guess China was asking to be ostracized from Nintendo, considering they've been pirating their goods essentially since 1983.

And I do remember the WonderSwan, but not sure what about it.
__________________
ajnrules is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2007, 04:29 PM   #6
Another Fan
Boulder Badge
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 189
Re: I want a Vii!

First of all, this is very awesome and funny. Nice find. Next, thank you very very much for the translation ajnrules. That was very thoughtful and I appreciate it.

Heh. Piracy. In russia, back when my first encounters with games were on the PC, my first home console played was the Dendy. I got introduced to classics like Hogan's Alley, Ice Climbers and Battletoads in like, 1998. T'was awesome. I only found out that the Dendy was an NES later, and even with Ice Climbers in SSBM, it took me like 7 years for me to connect that that game I loved playing with my cousin in Russia is a classic NES game.
__________________
[center:ac83b]


Fizzy Bubbles Information[/center:ac83b]
Another Fan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2007, 05:36 PM   #7
Talon87
時の彼方へ
 
Talon87's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Lafayette, Indiana
Posts: 20,578
Re: I want a Vii!

Well, I'll be damned! The Dendy. Crazy. Though Wiki's article suggests that even for Russia, getting a Dendy in 1998's a bit late. They say it came out in the early '90s. Do you still have your Dendy? You could probably sell it to an American hobbyist for more than double what you paid for it originally. Though you might not want to if it still holds sentimental value for you.
Talon87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2007, 08:31 PM   #8
Lady Kuno
The hostess with the mostess
 
Lady Kuno's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 226,522
Re: I want a Vii!

I saw this video earlier today actually, and I was surprized to see a thread about it here. The translation was interesting but I couldn't watch the whole video. They just showed the same 4 scenes over and over and over again.
__________________
JUST NUKE THE FUCKING SUN


PROUD OWNER OF A MISSINGNO. IN FIZZY BUBBLES
Lady Kuno is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-04-2007, 08:34 PM   #9
Talon87
時の彼方へ
 
Talon87's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Lafayette, Indiana
Posts: 20,578
Re: I want a Vii!

I bet you didn't see the Chinese dudes dismantling the Vii, though. :p

Kuno: Actually, I did. ¬¬
Talon: -_-
Kuno: Probably the same way you found it -- it's right there on the sidebar for the original video.
Talon: ._.
Talon87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-05-2007, 01:02 PM   #10
Another Fan
Boulder Badge
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 189
Re: I want a Vii!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xuande
Well, I'll be damned! The Dendy. Crazy. Though Wiki's article suggests that even for Russia, getting a Dendy in 1998's a bit late. They say it came out in the early '90s. Do you still have your Dendy? You could probably sell it to an American hobbyist for more than double what you paid for it originally. Though you might not want to if it still holds sentimental value for you.
Heh. Well, I remember being born and to some degree sentient when I played it, so yeah, I did get to it late. It actually was at my cousin's friend who lived in the apartment beside my grandmother on my father's side's apartment.

If I could get my hands on it, it would definately hold a lot of value for me.

Neat stuff really. My early experiences with games were a bit muddled really.
__________________
[center:ac83b]


Fizzy Bubbles Information[/center:ac83b]
Another Fan is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Lower Navigation
Go Back   UPNetwork > General Forums > Video Games


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:17 PM.


Design By: Miner Skinz.com
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.