Thread: The Bachelor
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Old 01-16-2016, 09:59 AM   #29
Jerichi
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Join Date: Mar 2007
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ALRIGHT MORE GROUP DATE

THIS ONE IS ALREADY LOOKING TO BE WEIRDLY SEXUAL

OF COURSE, SINCE THEY ARE CLEARLY STRAPPED FOR CASH, THEY MUST SHOEHORN AN UNNECESSARY PRODUCT PLACEMENT MOMENT WITH THE WEIRD IPAD CAMERA STICK ROBOT THAT THEY VERY CONSPICUOUSLY SHOW THE BRAND OF

THEY ALL GO INTO A WEIRD ROOM WITH A BUNCH OF ACTORS DRESSED AS SCIENTISTS AND DO A TON OF WEIRD "TESTS" TO MEASURE HOW IN LOVE THEY ARE

NEEDLESS TO SAY, THESE WOMEN PROCEED TO EMBARRASS THEMSELVES

THEY DO A RETINAL TRACKING TEST WHICH IS WEIRD BUT OKAY

BUT THE SECOND TEST IS A SWEAT SMELL TEST

AND THEY MAKE HIM SMELL THESE WOMEN'S NECKS AND HIPS

BECAUSE THEIR "REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS GIVE OFF PHEROMONES"

GOD ARE THE RATINGS REALLY THAT LOW

THIS IS UNBELIEVABLY CREEPY AND HE DESCRIBES THE GIRLS LIKE THEY'RE FRUITS

AND FINALLY, THEY PUT BEN AND ONE OF THE WOMEN IN WEIRD BORDERLINE SEXUAL SITUATIONS AND BROADCAST A THERMAL IMAGE OF THEM TO THE OTHERS

YEP RATINGS MUST BE IN THE TOILET

(SHIRTLESS COUNT: 3)

AFTER SOME MORE PSUEDO-SCIENTIFIC MUMBO JUMBO, THEY "SCIENTIFICALLY" RATE THE WOMEN ON "COMPATABILITY"

OFFICIAL BACHELOR POWER RANKINGS
  • SAM(ANTHA) 2.5
  • OTHER PEOPLE
  • TV ANCHOR 7.5

AND BOY DOES THIS IMMEDIATELY GO TO HER HEAD
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