Dwarf Fortress.

[dosuser]

So, we are going to start a FORTRESS. Post in here to get in on the game! I guess we'll play one year at a time and upload the save file here for the next person.

Obligatory link: http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Main_Page

Obligatory disclaimer: If you're the type of person who would say,
>I had to put it down after the first hour because of how damn complicated it was.
then this game is probably not for you.

Currently taking suggestions for starting location and setup, unless someone else wants to be the first one.

[dosuser]

First year is done, ready for Kuno's takeover. I decided to choose a map with chalk, since I like chalk.


Arrived on top of a grassy hill with plenty of chalk visible below.

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/2474/upn01.png


The hilltop turned out to be full of clay so it was easy to get a decent sized dining hall and food storage area.

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/7200/upn02.png


The next level down turned out to be all chalk so I made an area for loot piles and some workshops.

http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/3746/upn03.png


In the northeast, there was some visible lignite and bituminous coal for fuel.

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/9331/upn06.png


To the west was a big ridge made almost entirely of metal ore.

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/9844/upn07.png


The dwarven traders asked us for the following goods:

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/8499/upn05.png


Downstairs, I made the loot piles bigger and added some furnaces, guard dogs for the loot piles, a break room, and an office for Morg the Investor.

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/3980/upn04.png


Upstairs, I cut out a big trench for defense and sealed off the fort with two bridges, one to the north (first floor) and one to the south (above ground).

http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/7863/upn08.png


Hmm, UPN can't support zip files this large (about 6 MB). I'll have to upload it later （　´_ゝ`）

[Holy Emperor]

I settled in my new home, picking up from where Morg left off. Large images spoilered so they don't ruin tables.

Things start off instantly. For starters I forget I have a print screen button, but secondly 6 goblins appear and start smashing things. While we have 2 bridges, the lever is not ready yet, nor do we have an army. They beat up a few guys, but we manage to defeat them. Shortly after the bridge is ready. Lots of extra food rots, and below you can see the stink rise from the kitchen and some dead goblins (they are red g's)

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/miasma1.png


Time passes and eventually a few more people show up. It is still spring.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/migrants.png


Just in time too, we lost a few from the last attack. We were low on men as well. Hopefully they arn't completely useless... No wait 2 of them are fish gutters or something completely fucking useless. Did we get anyone useful?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/lasers.png


Woah that person sounds awesome. Some time passes and I notice some useless asshole takes over one of my crafting shops.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/possessed.png


What is it she is making, you ask?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/shittycrown.png


It is both useless, and fairly worthless. Good going. Of course as luck would have it, I don't get a moment to actually work on anything. Not long after this idiot stops buisness some other idiot decides to do the same.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/fey1.png


But then GOOD NEWS EVERYONE. Some more useless fucks show up in tow.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/migrants2.png


Sure they can help work and shit, but they're going to need more food, rooms, and other things I don't have anyone to make. Time to make them work for their shit. Speaking of working pointlessly, here's what the chick ended up making.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/turtlering.png


Hey asshole wheres the artwork celebrating my fucking greatness. Time to send her off to die.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/gooooold.png

That's right bitches, we struck gold. With no more idiots clogging up my workshops, I start pumping some gold ingots out. Time to impress the ladies with my bling. Naturally, I tell some of the new people to become mighty warriors. I train them in awesome and start building a cool fort for them.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/castle.png


From there, I plan to have snipers to watch over the back bridge, shown below (but offscreen) after a thief tried to steal stuff and got his shit WRECKED.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/thief.png


At this point I forget what season it is. People show up and ask for stuff to trade, but it's nothing we can really get so it is no big deal. However this is where the real problems begin to start. The people have betrayed me. I will never forgive him.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/bastard.png

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/plates.png


It doesn't take long for our ruler to issue idiotic mandates. Make some plate armors. Ok boss, right away asshole.



In other news, I begin digging deeper and deeper. I find tons of random gems, and a lot more gold. Eventually... I get this.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/uhhhhh.png


In case you can't tell, all those ! are actually people that are both hungry and thirsty and otherwise miserable. The floor is filled with filth, goo, blood, body parts, and other fun things.

Not long after I see this, which helps explain what the fuck happened.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/raw.png

Well now. Looks like we hit the fucking jackpot.


Wait a sec. What on earth is this?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/glowing.png

could it... could it be...?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/MAGMA.png

Ever since I was a little dwarf, there was one thing I've always wanted. And that was to burn things. With flaming hot magma. A moat with magma would be the greatest thing ever. And now it can be possible. Truely, this is a dream come true.


But first I got to get there. And what's the deal with these idiots?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/trapped.png

...


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/wtf.....png


Wow. I don't even know how to respond to that. What the fuck. Speaking of what the fuck...


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon.png

That's right. A fucking demon shows up. And is beating up a dog.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon1.png

Let's take a loot at this guy right here. Someone managed to shoot him. Maybe he did some damage!

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon2.png


Ok. Guess not. Sadly those wounds healed in a few seconds. This is a good time to run the fuck away guys. Guys...?

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon3.png

Backup plan ready. I installed a door. Please god let it work. Pleas god let it work. Please god let it work.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon4.png

Suddenly..

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon5.png

Come for the dwarves, stay for the demon rape. I guess news doesn't travel fast in dwarf land, we are getting fucked. But more meat shields are always welcome.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon6.png

And there goes the door. Fuck. Where the hell is my fucking army that I recruited? I told them to go down before I ordered the door.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon7.png

Dwarf Guard1: HEY GUYS THIS FOOD IS GREAT!
Dwarf Guard2: FUCK YEAH
Dwarf Guard3: Hey is that burning flesh I smell?
Dwarf Guard2: Just shut up and enjoy the break.


Eventually they start moving, although all they manage to go is one level down. To meet the demon midway, I guess. I guess they forgot he killed everyone in between. Eventually we fight, and it is quite the struggle.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon8.png


FUCK THAT'S ME. GET OUT OF THERE, ME. DON'T STAND NEXT TO HIM.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/demon9.png

Well, they manage to kill him. And I don't die. Lots of other dwarves died, but I didn't so it's ok. Nobody in my army died either, they are still 4 man strong.


Morg, the greatest mayor ever decides to celebrate. And what better way then to issue mandates for an item we don't have!

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/mandates2.png


I ignore him, and start digging to free the people. I'm not sure what the fuck they'll do, but I go for it anyway.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/dontdiedontdie.png


.....

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon1.png

What the fuck is this. Time to send the army again. They'll take care of this guy, no problem.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon2.png

Oh god. 2 more appear and rape my army....

And then 3 more appear and rape everyone else.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon3.png
Hey guys a bunch of people were just slaughtered by demons. You know what that means, right? PARTY TIME.



I try my best to break the stairs leading up. However my idiots are too busy panicing and running around, and don't get around to doing it. Their loss. Of life that is.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon4.png


I try to lock morg in his room to keep him safe. It doesn't work at all.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon5.png

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/tentdemon6.png

Oh you sons of bitches.


They go through and start killing everyone. One guy is left. Apparently he was outside. For some reason he really wants to go back in.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/lastman.png

He runs close to the bridge, a demon notices him, and then he runs away till it gives up. He does this for about 10 minutes (of pure excitement, let me tell you). Eventually the bridge is clear. He goes in to get whatever crap he wanted and gets it. However it was a tarp. They fuck him in the mouth.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/df/end.png




The end.

[dosuser]

So we have started anew. Let's hope we don't get killed right off the bat this ti--

Kuno: Hey, let's build on an EVIL map!

God save us all.

We struck the earth in the middle of a giant swamp. An EVIL swamp! I was expecting to be waist deep in evil goo or something, but this doesn't look so bad. Maybe we have a fighting chance after all!

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/2307/upn09.png


The top layer was made of sand... evil black sand!

http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/5166/upn10.png


All right, same strategy as before. Dig a bunch of workshops and loot piles on the floor underneath.

http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/8576/upn11.png


Saw some coal up in a northern cliff, time to use this to power our industry. Our EVIL industry.

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/9845/upn14.png


Now to get some metal ore. Looks like there's a ton of it in this southern cliff.

http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/3262/upn15.png


Yup. Definitely a safe plan there. Probably nothing lurking on those cliffs...

http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/5756/upn16.png


Wait, what's that?

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/1992/upn17.png


Eek! I'm just glad it's not an EVIL giant eagle. Haven't seen one of those..... yet.

Speaking of evil, time to work on our defenses. The murky pools all dried up in the summer heat (... the EVIL heat) but luckily the stream was flowing strong all year and we diverted it into our moat.

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/696/upn12.png


Time to carve out some rooms for cool people. Mainly me.

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/7215/upn13.png


And now to start getting some LOOT. The miners struck tons of random gems and a good deal of metal ore in this chalk layer.

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/5962/upn18z.png


And now let's see what kind of EVIL will be wrought by Kuno.

[Holy Emperor]

Wuahahaha. Our non-evil dwarves tried their best to survive. Not this time around.

Not much happens at first. I continue digging randomly. After a while, some hippies show up.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/hippies.png

I just hope they don't notice the giant wood pile a foot away. Whoops.

While I'm digging I find a very large amount of orz. I mean ores. The good kind, the ones that turn into steel. I begin processing them into awesome stuff.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/orz.png

Eventually the pace picks up as some evil dwarves decide to join us. Sadly, upon closer inspection, they seem like regular dwarves.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/migrants.png

Eventually the hippies leave and nobody cares. However not long after these bums arive...

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/withdraws.png

Oh boy this will be fun. He takes over a craftshop and starts working instantly. Let's see what it is...

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/mug.png

Oh yes. The legendary MUG, Egastbunem. Thank you for this very kind contribution to all of dwarfkind.

Eventually some humans arrive. I queue up our trade materials then wait.

And wait.

They are about to leave! Our trader is still not there yet. >_< Morgggggggg

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/morgparty.png

He manages to make it in time, and we trade away. How exciting.


The interesting thing is not far from the trading spot I see Morgs evil friend.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/eagle.png

With this guy shot down, I quickly start gathering some of the evil phat loot it was guarding.

This continue and I decide to pimp our moat a bit. One square of water is nothing, why not make it... two squares.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/moat.png

But sadly, dwarves are retarded.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/drown.png

Nobody else shows up, and not long after, we get a guy in a fey mood.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/mood.png

Our last champ made a mug. Don't dissapoint us bro. Meanwhile, while making low income housing for poor down on their luck people dwarves, I find some sexy evil gems.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/gems.png

Oh and the artifact is done. I can only wonder what amazing relic has been produced.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/idol.png

...

It menaces with spikes of ROPE. How the fuck does rope spike menacingly? It looks like a noose and you get to hang yourself? Our moat must be spiked because these dwarves are fucktarded.


Anyway the game lags out or morg was busy for a while or something happened, because eventually dwarf traders come and go, and long after they leave their people bug me for what they want.


http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/demandh.png

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/demandd.png


This part gets boring. I just make stuff for a while. I decide to make a shootery. A giant fort around the moat to shoot stuff.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/shootery.png

I also do some stuff to the bridge and test it out. But sadly there were no survivors.

http://www.upnetwork.net/upnetwork/2/whoops.png

Nothing of interest happened in the winter. Sadly, no demons broke free and killed us all. YET!


So who's next?